How to talk to your kids about dating
How did I get from there to dropping off my own daughter at the doorstep of romance?And was there a way to make those girl-meets-boy dramas any less heart crushing?Ask your child about the qualities that are important for a person who may become part of the family. Only introduce a potential partner to your child when the relationship is serious.It is confusing for your child when multiple potential partners are introduced and when they are introduced too quickly.But it can also be a confusing time and a difficult time for parents too. Gail Saltz, a psychiatrist with New York Presbyterian Hospital, has some advice. Your relationship with your partner is a model for how your teen will behave with others. Being manipulated, verbally put down, pushed or slapped and kept isolated from other relationships are all signs of an abusive relationship. Tell them they need to be honest and clear in communications. Make them think seriously about what sexual intimacy really means to them.Teen dating can be a wonderful and fun time where self confidence is built up, and dating techniques are learned. Attorney General reports that 38 percent of date rape victims are girls between the age of 14 and 17. Teach them how to date, how to have respect for one another and how to protect themselves from emotional and physical hurt. Your relationship for your child speaks far louder than anyone’s words. Help them pay attention to the voice inside that says, “I’m uncomfortable in this situation and don’t want to do this.” Teach them to trust their judgment. Tell your sons that having sex does not make them a man and tell your daughters that having sex does not make them cool. Make sure both your son and daughter understand that, and that they should come to you or another parent/teacher/counselor if they feel at all threatened or oppressed by their boyfriend or girlfriend. “I’m not sure…” from a girl can mean “I just need to be pushed or pressured some more before I say yes” to her date. Tell boys if they hear “No” then proceeding anyway is rape. Tell boys they are not expected to try a million different ways to get sex." She still seemed too young for a middle-school mixer and the awkwardness that accompanied it.I thought about my first dance: standing alone in a corner, not moving, desperately waiting for him to notice me.
That's no simple task—kids seem to leapfrog from sweet curiosity about the opposite gender to demanding to know when they're allowed to date to holding hands, kissing and more.
Try to be open to discussing it, rather than lecturing them.
You want them to listen to your opinion, yet at the same time feel they are making up their own mind.
-Ask for your child’s views, but do not ask for your child’s approval of the person you date.
It is not their responsibility to decide whether or not someone will be your future partner or become part of the family.